Heart Growing

 There are 4 type of people who have children 1. Intentionally want children for the right reason 2. Intentionally want children for the wrong reason 3. Unintentionally get children cause of not protected sex 4. unintentionally get children cause of over protected sex 4. Want to experience sex and love but also have lots of fear that might get pregnant in the end there fear come true, some cant raise there own , some give there child to who want to adopt and some who are not aware of there action throw there child sadly to see that happen.  3. Enjoy sex and love so much forgot to protect themselves or educate themselves of the consequence that would happen if there did get pregnant and outcome have to quite school, give they child to their mother to raise, sacrifice they dream to raise this child with lots of condition loves and some give for adoption.  2. Want someone to carry there surname, run the company or business the parent own, want to past on they knowledge to th...

 I feel the home is in my heart but I keep them open just for divine to get in I am scared of this fragile heart it still need lots of strong foundation.  You could be the one but it will take time for me to know if you are really the one, When am alone I think of you; want to imagine you being by my side how it would be like, would we cuddle or will you tell me to go cook food or would u join me in the kitchen. If you live in my mind you would see paradise but all I can say in this paradise there isn't any phone cause I got you next to me why would I need any gadget to distract myself when I have you by my side to give me company, Would we read books and exchange notes do farming together and during free time painting our home with many colorful every step have rainbow colors.  Sitting on chair made by me from all plastic DIY work 😂 Living with just simple things not too much things to make us happy as long as we got each other back. 

My heart still beat for you and will always have ur name and memories.  This heart want to be near u doesn't know why. maybe you are the first that this heart love. But u are gone we could only be friends but not lover. I know this much if you got someone else I would still send u and ur family lots of love unlimited 💗💕 always. 

Don't wait  ... let's imagine you want to give flower to your family (Flower = Love) Have a Garden in your Mind but you never took time to take care of the garden in your mind to grow all beautiful flowers 💐to give and share them with ur family but instead u just give them empty bouquet with no flowers in them the result would be no peaceful, happiness would turn into emptiness, love will also feel fake and laughing will be looking for in media instead with each other. Now You started notice that the garden you neglected had all kinds of weeds took roots it's full of unpleasant plants with thorns, some flower stick to your clothes wouldn't let go also hurt it tichy as well. U started taking out the thorns but it hurts your name & you fall down to cry cause nobody wants to give you helping hand to clean your garden (mindset - Thoughts). Your first priority should always be you meaning take care of your mindset with mindfulness practice, self talk, meditation &...

My heart say Oh sweet love you give me joy like no other, Love the way you smile that melt my heart  The way u share ur pain, time and a phone call. Don't know why u care for me but I love that they is someone cares for me. I want to be girl again but you aren't near so I still need to be alpha again. You give me hope there is still love for me , that somebody would care for me and love me. Other then myself.

You aren't a burden to anyone remember this if anyone even if it's your love ones or frds or strangers say this that mean there mind is toxic and full of dark clouds, they can't help it so to dump out there negative thinking to someone near by picking some hurtful comment just so there could get rid of they negative trash mindset. It wasn't really about u in then first place.  People words are like weather someday cloudy ⛅,  thunder ⛈,  lightning 🌩,  sunny 🌞,  rainbow 🌈,  rain 🌧 if you can be stable with weather then be stable with people words too.  Just imagine when u are happy how do u act or say and tone of your voice. Now when u get upset your tone of voice changes also words too.  Same things happen to all people but only few knows the are of responsibility of there emotions and self control. 

 Honesty Many are afraid of being honest even with our children, love ones, our parents, teachers, media and entertainment has BIG Part to play here Teaching us and guiding us to have these qualities in our life and it becomes our habits: Lying - to get absence from school (If we were honest but still wasn't allow to get holiday but after lying we did what is the point of being honest in the first place) Assumption - Teacher teach us to make assumption of the incident, math's solution, picture stories and assumption about people, cultures and country. Wrong and Right - was taught in school by our teacher what is wrong and right why not replace those words with mistake and learn. Learn from mistake and if make same mistake again get to the root of the cause sometime not understanding can tend to make the same mistake again. Judgement - teaching judging our grade evaluate our knowledge what we learn so far, judging our character and later teach us to do the same thing. (Wow what ...

 Why do we crave 😋💓Love?             I was in search of the real meaning of Love. Was looking for Love like I have experience this blissful feeling before but I am unable to find it here, wanted to understand what is love really and how to love correctly that doesn't bring pain like everyone else is experiencing.          Till today I still have memories of what Love should be like I was introvert I never dare share my feeling cause scared God like people would and society would crush the love I have for the world, people and nature around me. I only wanted to see good in people I have this believe system since childhood that nobody was born to be bad there wasn't bad or good in Love Language for me. Slowly I grew up observe people around me they behavior taught me there didn't know how to love hoping there was school that teach how to love sadly that kind of school is not available. 😂 What was I thinking back then.  ...

Not being around people I am ok but once I get the taste of being close to someone,  Why does this heart want to feel hug and physicals touch just to make sure that person is really in my life. Then again my heart say to let go of all this illusion of connection cause am still trap in the cage of desire of this body consciousness. Why do I need to be soul conscious? So you don't become too attach to anyone and still live your life in peace without having desire when you are in body consciousness. Is it wrong to just have someone I could feel they touch, hug and stroke of they hand on my face and getting the sense of they body smell just to feel they are for real in my life.  Is not wrong at all to have those feeling but at what cost just be patience with yourself enjoy the touch, hug that you getting from your son. I want to live alone so I don't have this desire of wanting someone cause already living with someone still make me feel like am living in pin and needles. I want t...

When you are hungry for your favorite meal you buy them, cook them or if remember the meal u love a lot so u wanted to learn how to make it.  What if we also do the same with love, everyone is hungry for unconditional love but there never got it and how there have this memory of unconditional love we all might have experience it before but just don't remember where. Being introvert taught me that I should be comfortable for who I am, accept myself, don't have to compete with others, have fun with my life learn explore and treat everyone the way I wanted to be treated even if they still don't treat me right I shouldn't change myself to be just like them then the war will never end.  After practice mindfulness, unconditional love and meditation to give me power of self control I started to notice when I speak alone with god and visualize his love for me unlimitedly I felt more happy around him and being myself also got confident back. This was the love I was looking for u...

            Being introvert is blessing💖, cause we notice how people react, behave and talk💬 to each other bring pain. These small little things we notice and want to go inward to check why we get emotions to they words so easily, what cause us to hurt ourselves when infect we only wanted to give love and get love in return.              When we couldn't fine save group of people who we can share our deep inner secret, feeling, desire and thoughts. We start to compare ourselves with others, feeling sorry for ourselves and wishing we were like them who are extrovert.  But slowly when I start to ask many important question to myself I discover that being Introvert is a blessing in disguise how you ask lets see the question below that I ask myself. 1. What if I talk to someone new today be myself and honest as well? I did that experiment you wouldn't believe the result I got just being honest to stranger about my bad p...